When a friend is struggling—stressed, anxious, or dealing with health issues—you want to help but might not know how. Start small. A calm, nonjudgmental presence often matters more than big gestures. This guide gives clear, practical steps you can take right away, plus how to spot when they need more than a friend can give.
Open with something honest and short: “I’ve noticed you seem off—want to talk?” Let them talk without fixing everything. Ask one simple question at a time. Reflect what you hear: “That sounds exhausting.” Don’t downplay feelings with “It’s not a big deal.” Validation helps them feel seen and less alone.
If they don’t want to talk, offer specific, low-pressure help: “Want to grab coffee tomorrow?” or “Can I text you tonight?” Vague offers rarely get used. Give options and a clear window so they can say yes without feeling obligated.
Hands-on support beats advice. Bring a meal, run an errand, or sit with them at an appointment. If medications or insurance are part of the issue, offer to help look up coverage or prescription options—tools like a formulary search can save time and reduce stress.
Make small routines: a weekly check-in, a short walk together, or a shared workout class. These create gentle accountability and remind them someone cares. If sleep or food is off, suggest tiny, doable steps: one walk, one balanced meal, or five minutes of breathing before bed.
Avoid fixing by force. Saying “You should…” or comparing their struggle to someone else’s can shut conversations down. Instead, ask what they think would help and offer to try it with them.
Set boundaries for your own time and energy. Helping is generous, not limitless. If you need a rest, say so and suggest another way to help—text check-ins, researching resources, or joining them for appointments.
Watch for warning signs that need urgent attention: talk of harming themselves, sudden withdrawal, dramatic mood swings, or neglecting basic care. If you see these, stay with them if safe and contact emergency services or a crisis line. Encourage immediate professional care; don’t try to manage a crisis alone.
If the issue is ongoing—like chronic anxiety, health anxiety, or persistent stress—gently suggest professional help and offer to help with the first steps: finding a therapist, making a phone call, or checking what their coverage includes. Offer to sit in the waiting room if they want company.
Helping friends doesn’t require perfect words. Show up, listen, do small practical things, and know when to hand off to professionals. Your steady, honest support can make a huge difference.
In this piece, we'll explore how to effectively support a friend who's going through a mental health crisis. We'll touch on the importance of understanding, compassion, and patience, as well as offering practical advice on how to navigate these challenging situations. This is a topic that touches many of us, and it's essential to equip ourselves with the knowledge to offer the right kind of support. After all, our friends' wellbeing matters deeply to us, and we want to be there for them in the best way we can. Journey with me as we unpack this important and sensitive topic.
Read More